Fatherly Love

Wednesday ~ 3/8/2023

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Blog #2

            Hey you! Welcome back :) or if this is the first blog that you are reading welcome :) 

So the main reason as to why I wanted to start a blog in the first place is because I was watching a documentary by one of my favorite youtubers (KSI: In Real Life) which I highly recommend by the way, and he showed many vulnerable and debatable emotional moments. One of the topics that was shown in the documentary was the struggles between a father-son relationship. I won't go into too much detail as it is his content and I much rather you guys to go check it out but when he spoke about this topic and made me think a lot. So as previously mentioned in my introduction blog, I am a Mexican college man. Now, a lot of the things mentioned can also relate to mothers and the relationship with their children but I want to only speak on my own experiences and things I've noticed with many online postings I've come by or just a societal norm. I've noticed that certain races or ethnic groups have very tough father-son relationships. It is very rare to hear a father say "I love you" for these groups. Growing up, very rarely did I hear my dad say he loved me, and I know for many other people in this group, they rarely hear their father say they are proud of them. Now this is something hard for guys to open up about, specially because men have to act tough, they are not meant to be emotional, we are meant to be independent and strong. However, we are also human beings, we have feeling and emotions, we go through a lot of problems too. My dad wouldn't be very open with things because he also went through the same expectations. There would be times where I'd be very angry at him for being hard on me when I'd get hurt either physically or emotionally. Now, here is where it all gets tricky, this is one of those times where the reactions a kid has depends on how the kid takes it. An example of this "theory" is of twins with a drunk dad, the dad would get very drunk all the time and he was very absent, one of the twins ended up like the dad, as a consistent drunk, while the other twin used the experience to never drink alcohol so he wouldn't end up like his dad. They grew up in the same environment, they just took it a different way. This would be one of those times where many kids may have been in my position and would have a lot of damage or trauma. However, I took it as a way for me to become stronger, I have a high pain tolerance in case I get into an accident of sorts or in case there is something I do or go through that may hurt such as getting injured playing sports or getting tattoos, and I also became very independent and emotionally strong where if someone said mean things to me, I wouldn't care, like I genuinely wouldn't get bothered by it. Now in return I also didn't grow up properly knowing how to deal or communicate with something that bothered me in a certain way, cause I was always a suck it up and keep going type of guy. This isn't just something with me, many other guys grew up the same way because certain fathers have a harsh way of upbringing which may have its pros such as creating a strong and independent son, or cons such as creating a misguided or broken son. The issue behind all of this is having to follow the societal norms that as men we are told to follow and are also the same norms dads pass down onto their sons without even being aware of it. All in all, I love my dad and I know he loves me, he'd support my soccer dreams and activities, he'd tell me how proud he'd be of my accomplishments such as honor roll at school, spelling bee victories, being able to drive far on my own, things like that, but I do wish society would ease up on the pressure put on men to be rough and tough because it can genuinely hurt a guy growing up not knowing how their dad truly felt about them, because at the end of the day, knowing that your dad loves you or is proud of you, can make a huge difference on a boy or even at their grown stages. If any fathers are reading this remind your kids you love them and that you are proud of them, you never know just how much it may mean to them. And to my dad, thanks for everything you've done to me :) you are one of my role models along with my mom and I applaud the sacrifice and effort you've done for my sisters and I.

Thanks for reading this blog and stay tuned for the next blog, it might just connect with this blog nicely :)

This is Elite Philosophy from Blanked Filter signing off...